choosing

It's been a while since I've posted and I'm not entirely sure what's been stopping me...

ok, as soon as I finished typing that line, I realized that I do know, I'm just not going to talk about it.

Regardless, I need to return The Happiness Project to the friend who let me borrow it but before I do, there are a couple of things I feel compelled to process a little further - and have on "paper" for me to refer back to. 

If you've taken a peek at my "new gadget/widget/whatev" you have seen that I really identified with the author (Gretchen Rubin) of this book, but there was one chapter in particular that actually made me stop reading and think.  This was followed by re-reading, more thinking, reading aloud to my husband and discussing in small chunks for several days (with 3 kids, that's how you discuss just about everything!).

Each of the chapters in this book is a month dedicated to a specific goal - of course, this I love!  In my world goals = gooood! (but more on that in another post).  The November chapter was called: Keep a Contented Heart.  As a Christ-follower, this is not a new concept - who hasn't memorized Philippians 4:11-13 at some point or another?  But one of the things that really struck me as Rubin unfolded what keeping content was going to look like in her life, was how far off the mark I really can be!  I mean, I'm content with my home and possessions, my appearance (most days of the month), my lot in life, my ministry and spiritual gifts - so that's it, right?  Well, look at this....

She breaks down her monthly goals into sub-goals (and of course, this I love!): i) laugh out loud, ii) use good manners, iii) give positive reviews, iv) find an area of refuge.  The first has been something I've been working on for quite a while.  If you have kids, watch their faces when they are able to make you really laugh, with complete abandon - you've never seen such delight!  Choosing to find the fun/funny in things is a gift you give to others.  Here's a quote that will take you right to the point:

found it here

"Responding with laughter meant that I had to give up my pride, my defensiveness, my self-centeredness."

 (page 264)

This is one I had to chew on for quite a while. This doesn't just mean being able to laugh at yourself, though that's part of it.  It means making the choice to let go and just enjoy instead of seeing the down-side of things, or thinking that this world is all about me. 

Yesterday after school, my kids were talking about how they'd spent their indoor recesses, and the younger two were demonstrating their "mad skillz" in dance having played Just Dance 2 on the Wii in the gym.  Please believe me when I say I'm not usually so indulgent, but I actually went out and got the game, just so I could see them dance.  As we broke out some moves (myself included, I'll have you know!) my oldest kept choosing a game and then refusing to dance to it.  This poor sweetie - first born, potential perfectionist - could not let go.  She heard us all laughing together and assuming we were making fun of her.  My heart broke, because I know what that feels like.  It can be so hard to let yourself just be silly for the sake of fun.

As I quoted a while ago (and Rubin quotes often in the book):

It is easy to be heavy; hard to be light

G.K.Chesterson



Do you think it requires giving up pride, defensiveness and self-centeredness to be more fun and laugh out loud?

Do you think making this choice would help you feel more content in life?

I've always thought it was a personality-related thing - that there are just certain types of people that do this naturally and easily.  But is that really the case?

More on that next time....

dun, dun, duuunnnn.....

(cliff hanger music!)