puzzling

So, it's the end of the Thanksgiving Day Long Weekend, and the end of a very busy week for me.  After we got home from the second day of family festivities with my in-laws, I started to think about what I could do to "treat" myself and really relax!  Gavin had already made plans to go to a movie (I wish I could say I was thrilled for him instead of bitter....), so I knew I had to think of something at home.  

I finally settled on doing a puzzle.

Maybe that sounds lame to you, but I really enjoy puzzles but haven't done many over the past years because if you have little ones around all the time, it can get rather frustrating to have them "help" or undo what you've accomplished. 

The kids had "enjoyed" each other enough for one long weekend and hit the hay a little early.  I made myself a cup of tea, opened a box I had gotten quite a while ago for just such an occasion and started flipping and sorting the pieces.

It got me to thinking about what I like about puzzles....puzzles are constant - the rules don't change, the picture doesn't alter and even if you walk away from it for days, it will stay locked together (provided there aren't any 'helping hands' around).  Also, there is a basic formula for puzzling that never fails: sort the pieces into straight-edgers and non, assemble the frame, move on to bigger, solid-coloured objects and fan out from there.  The third thing I like about puzzles is watching the picture come into focus.  The  puzzle I'm putting together is call 'The Tea Room' and looks like a photo taken in small town France (at least that's what I've decided!).  This puzzle has 750 pieces and each is pretty small, so you can't really identify the small wildflowers on each piece, but as they begin to interlock, you get a clear image of the bigger picture.

What does this say about me?  I'm smiling as I write this, because you can probably seen right through my enjoyment of puzzling and are now looking at my heart.  How my fallen nature would love to have this kind of control over my life...not to mention the lives of those I love.  How I would love to live in a world that was predictable and simple, where the basic formula always worked and you could gaze at the picture on the outside of the box, knowing always how each piece would come together to create something beautiful!  

But where would God be?  Would I need Him?  Would I even want Him?

If I could look at my life and see each step that is laid out before me -  and I could see where these many steps would take me, why would I need faith?  Would it make the really hard times easier just because I knew they were coming?  Knowing myself, I'm pretty sure I would end up doing everything possible to avoid the yucky stuff - but how would I grow?

"Many, O LORD my God, are the wonders you have done.  

The things you planned for us no one can recount to you; 

were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare."  

Psalm 40:5

I choose to trust that God has a plan for my life that will challenge and bless me, fulfill me and cause me to become a beautiful woman in His sight.  I believe that when my days are through and I look at the finally completed puzzle of my life, I will be blessed for having walked by faith, not knowing but trusting.