They say if you really want to know if you love something too much, try to live without it.  

Well, apparently I have discovered how much I really love my tv.

how sad.

I suspected it was the case, which is why I gave it up for Lent.  

I contemplated whether I was even willing to talk about this because I find it kind of embarassing.  TV? Really?  Plus, I'm a little afraid that by admitting I have given up tv, people will think I must watch it all day, every day.  Let me assure you, that is simply not so!  I have my shows, yes.  And I would tend to end my day with a little dose of tmz (did I seriously just admit that?).  Oh, and occasionally I'd flip to Ellen in the morning if I were really tired....

yikes, it's adding up!

Regardless, it's been almost a full week since Lent began last Wednesday and I'm ashamed to say it's been so hard!  G jokes that it's like I turned my back on a friend and now she's turned her back on me.

I'm so restless.

I'm SO bored.

I sit in front of the computer and I'm bored.  I read a book and I'm bored.

I don't even feel like shopping!  

I've been going to bed at 9pm because I'm too tired (or lazy, or lethargic) to do anything productive and too bored to just SIT there.

BUT, the point of giving something up at Lent isn't to fill that time or energy with just anything (don't think I didn't consider how many of my shows are available for watching online!).  The point is to use that time to reflect on the sacrifice Jesus made by giving up His home in heaven and coming to earth to be my Saviour!  The point is to identify with Him in some small way, and watch to see how He fills in the empty spaces.

"Open wide your mouth and I will fill it."
Psalm 81:10b

When I give the Lord my extra time, He MULTIPLIES it!  I didn't spend hours on end watching tv each day, and yet without it I'm able to:

Spend more time on my Bible Study homework, 
really letting it take root in my life instead of rushing to just get it done!

Listen to all those Focus on the Family Podcasts I've been
downloading for months.  What do you know, I'm actually LEARNING a thing or two!

Bake blueberry muffins and raisin bread with a very pleased 4 year old.

I felted old wool sweaters to make these sweet brooches I saw online.
(I know, that's just going too far...)

I even have time to not only think about but also PREPARE for some 
speaking-type things I have coming up.

I've been waking up rested - and haven't slept through morning devos with G once!
My fridge is clean and I think I may even get to the pile of ironing!
Heck, I might even EXERCISE!

I'm accountable now, and that's a little scary, but I'm just taking it a day at a time.  I want to offer the best of my days to the Lord, not the scraps!  Until the lenten season is over, I will persevere :)  but I'm also praying that this will enable me to use more wisdom and discernment in the future!

did YOU give anything up? (and has it been as hard for you as it has been for me?)


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