on again/off again

today's the day i write about the trouble with blogging.  you may notice that i have troubles with this by the fact that i go through spurts and breaks, taking this blog off for public view and putting it back on.  the inconsistency of that really bothers me.  alot.


the trouble with blogging is that it is so one sided.  


i really like the process of writing - it helps me think things through.  i like taking or finding pictures and "pretty-ing" things up.  i like the editing and arranging of posts and my page.


i just wish everyone who read my blog had a blog also.  or maybe that we could sit down and chat about things, so that i could spout off my views (as i do here) and then you could tell me what you think.


the trouble with blogging is that it can give a sense of intimacy that might not be real.


if you've read this blog, you know alot about who i am.  honesty is one of the character traits i value the most, and so while i'm by no means perfect (so, so far from that), everything i write here is true and reveals some of the deepest parts of my heart.  this can leave me feeling really naked and exposed.  i don't know the deepest parts of most of you.  if you keep a journal, it's kind of like leaving your journal on the coffee table, for anyone to flip through....or maybe more like leaving it at the bus stop...


by now i can imagine what you're thinking. (given that i have the gift of telepathy - just kidding!)


becky - blogging is your choice.  what you share is your choice.  whether or not you link to FB is your choice.


oh friend, you are so right!


i have thought about it so much - probably almost too much.  i have prayed about it as i wish and long for meaningful relationships.  i have asked for guidance, for wisdom, for peace.


today the Lord answered in short melody based on a verse i long ago memorized:

"no weapon formed against you will prosper"
(isa 54:17)

my eyes have been opened to the truth of 1 peter 5:7-8 as i considered all the ways i have let the devil whisper lies to me (you have no friends, no one cares what you have to say, you are worthless...).

dear reader (if you're out there) this blog is not for you.  it for my Lord.  sometimes it will be heavy (like today!) and sometimes it will be light and fluffy.  sometimes i'll ask questions, sometimes i'll have found an answer to talk about.  

i pray that i'll have the strength to stand each day against everything that fights against who God has intended me to be and today i pray that for you too.

average

av·er·age

 [av-er-ij, av-rij] 

noun,adjective, verb, -aged, -ag·ing.

        

 noun ~a quantity, rating, or the like that represents or approximates...

adjective ~typical; common; ordinary.

Driving with my husband the other day, he spotted a sign outside a building that said:

"The average man thinks he isn't."

I did not see the sign, but I heard him muttering about it, and asked what the problem was.  He said, "that isn't true. Most people think they're average, even if they're not."

At this, I cocked an eyebrow.

I distinctly remember many years ago, when I came to the realization that I was completely average.  

~average brown hair,

~blue-grey eyes (very common)

~average height and weight

~average shoe size (which is why my size is always gone during a good sale!)

~average intelligence - smart enough, but no Einstein!

~average skills in many areas...actually, I always thought that certain skills of mine balanced out my lack of athletic skills.

I didn't think this was a bad assessment.  I like the fact that I don't stick out too much either way.

Today I read:

"average is in the eye of the beholder."

Well, that's probably true...

God's Word says that I'm "fearfully and wonderfully made" and don't think I'm denying that by clinging to my claim of average-ness.  I think He made me this way, because He knew this is how I'd be most comfortable....and while we all have times where we struggle to be content with what we've got (and have not got), I praise God for each day that I become a little more like Him.

For this is the only thing that could set me apart from the rest of the average world.  I am a believer, "cleaned up by Jesus and set apart for a God-filled life." (1 Corinthians 1:1 MSG)  

Perhaps I'm rising above average after all.