my husband brought home this beautiful box of mandarine oranges,
and as i opened the box and saw all those perfect pieces of red tissue paper, i thought, i should craft something out of those papers!
and then i saw the solid cardboard base of the box and thought, i should mod-podge that and use it for...something.
and then i remembered - that's not something i would ever do. that is simply not who i am!
as i laughed and laughed (to myself, at myself) i thought about how bizarre it is that i would even think about doing those things...
i thought about how i guess i'm not always who i thought i'd be "when i grew up."
i considered how i'm still surprised at how uncomfortable i am in social settings - i really thought i'd grow out that!
i wondered about how i became the kind of mom that (sometimes) bakes bread and (mostly) cooks from scratch, considering i wasn't really in to those things growing up.
i marveled again at the gift of my role in our church, the fun and challenge of serving, the joy of doing pre-marriage counseling (when our early years of marriage at times felt like an absolute disaster!).
God had a plan for me, a design for who i could become under His hand, and as long as i don't bother myself with comparison, i can like who i am. imperfect, with lots of room to grow but uniquely me. so what if i do things a little differently than others, or don't do really cool things that other really cool friends can do? my only desire is to hear the voice of the Lord and do what He calls me to do.
it's just me. some people will like me, some will not. but my sense of approval and self-worth must come from Him alone.
Can we just embrace who God is creating us to be today?
The Lord will work out his plans for my life—
for your faithful love, O Lord, endures forever.
Don’t abandon me, for you made me.
psalm 138:8 nlt